I want this post to focus on respect. Respecting your family, your friends, your neighbors, those you don’t get along with, those you dislike, your professors, that random person you pass on the sidewalk, those of higher authority and those of lower social standing then you consider yourself to be. Respecting everyone. And I want you to think about how you develop that respect (or perhaps even other feelings) for them.
I think that the social configuration of this campus, as well of current society in general, is ridiculously complicated. I think there is a lot of “hate” being passed around, and some people think it’s cool to “hate on” others. For example, let’s say, hypothetically, that you told me “I hate Justin Bieber.” What are you actually saying? Are you saying that you disapprove of his lifestyle? Or maybe you don’t appreciate his vocal or dancing skills? Is it an insinuation that you want me to think you’ve actually MET Justin Bieber, and have thus come to the conclusion that he is a bad person? Take your pick, because I honestly don’t know the answer. In all likelihood, you have probably not actually met The Biebster. You do not know him personally; all you know about him is what the media has told you. Is this really the best way to judge someone?
While I think it is completely right and acceptable to have opinions about people, I think they should be based on true fact and personal experience. These confines DO NOT include crap the media mentions. (When I speak of media, I do not mean legitimate news sources such as CNN, NPR, etc.) The thoughts and opinions you formulate should be (almost) completely of your own deduction (I say almost because you will, without a doubt, be influenced by others’ opinions, whether you think you are or not.). Unfortunately, it is not the good thoughts and feelings about people I am talking about today; it is the negative ones.
You know there are people you don’t especially like or don’t get along with. Please do not say that you hate them. Hate is such a strong word, and has too many connotations that go along with it. (Without elaborating excessively on the topic of connotations that go along with the word ‘hate,’ I will just say it creates a type of ambiguity when it comes to defining its meaning.) Which brings me back to the Justin Bieber idea. Do you really “hate” him? Or do you just dislike his singing? Because if you just dislike his singing, I completely respect that opinion. You have based it off of something legitimate which you have personally judged. The logic makes sense. This legitimate “dislike of Justin Bieber’s singing” that you harbor does not mean that you hate him. This is good; hate is the last thing anybody needs directed toward them. Instead, everyone should get respect directed toward them.
Yes, R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Find out what it means to you. It is my personal belief that even if you dislike a person, their lifestyle, or their actions, that you should still have respect for them as fellow Homo sapiens. Respect includes, but is by no means limited to: not badmouthing (aka making fun of, saying bad things about, spreading rumors, etc.) them behind their back, not badmouthing them to their face (however, respectful discourse is permitted and even encouraged in these cases), listening to their thoughts and logic, not abusing them or their belongings in a malicious manner, and a large assortment of other disrespectful actions. You ARE entitled to your opinion about everything and everyone (as long as it is logical…), but please do not include disrespect or outright hate in your opinions unless it stems from an ordered and consistent source. If you’re going to think something bad about a person, then think it! Please don’t feel the need to share your hurtful thoughts with others—in most cases, doing so would help no one (except for if you are psychologically imbalanced—like a murderer or something, in which case you probably have much larger problems to take care of and you SHOULD go talk to someone about your feelings). I believe the old adage holds true; “If you’re not going to say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all.” Again, I want to clarify that this does not hold true for debates and things of the like, because without disagreement, the world would be a boring place. If you are going to disagree with someone, please do it respectfully. If you dislike someone, please do it respectfully.
[On a side note, I would like to mention that disliking a person’s actions and disliking a person are two entirely different concepts. I would also like to acknowledge that sometimes, loss of respect for and genuine hate of a person are completely okay (take the majority of people’s feelings towards Hitler, or other mass murderers, for example).]
I encourage you to think about how your opinions are formed, and for what reasons they stand. And please, don’t lose your respect for people too easily.
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